Tuesday, June 30, 2009

What Dana Wants - A to Z

I typed this list while watching The Bridges of Madison County. I have to be selective and not settle. Because I don't want to end up like Francesca, 80 years old, nursing my dying husband who was just "so-so" for our 50 years of marriage, while my soulmate is off somewhere in the world without me. No thanks.

So, in the spirit of "not settling", here is my A-Z list of qualities a guy must possess to be the future Mr. Dana's Husband.

Anchor – I am a strong woman, but I want (not “I need”) an anchor, just like with ships. I can be eccentric and sometimes I need somebody to bring me back down to Earth. I know I can be the anchor if need be, but isn’t that one of the job descriptions for guys?

Blithe – He needs to be joyous and carefree. Not one of those ultra-serious types who makes me wonder during dinner, “Is he still thinking about work? Or is he thinking he must have been crazy to agree to be my boyfriend? Or do I smell bad? Which one??”

Cavalier – I’m a southern girl. I need a gentleman.

Debonair – A self-assured man is so very incredible. I have dated my fair share of “Sloppy McSloppersons”, therefore I can appreciate a sharp-dressed man.

Exhilarating – I want to be swept off my feet. Over and over again.

Fit – If our bodies are temples, do I really want someone who throws trash into the temple? No thanks.

Green – I hope to have a guy to help me remember to bring my re-usable bags to the grocery store.

Horticultural – True to my old-lady form, I love my garden and I love my plants. I don’t want someone who is jealous of the time I’m spending with my plant friends. How about someone who puts some gloves on and helps?

Impromptu – I would just adore someone who doesn’t live a strictly planned life, and who can wisk me off somewhere with no notice. Even if it is just to the park.

Jocular – Someone who loves to laugh is someone who has my vote. There is no other way to be.

Knowledgeable – He needs to be able to throw trivia at me that is harder than “Guess what the Statue of Liberty is made out of...” And I’d be okay with him beating me at Jeopardy every once in a while. Well... maybe.

Leery – I know this sounds strange, but I need someone who is just as leery as I am. I don’t trust many folks. The last thing I need is our life savings wasted on some shady guy who promises my guy a great return on something like Chrysler stock.

Mature – There is a time and place for everything, but if I have to fight the Xbox for his attention, we have a problem.

Neat – I am a neat freak in most instances, and we’re going to rumble if I have to move his boxer briefs off the couch for a guest to sit down.

Observant – How nice it would be if he could immediately identify a shift in my mood, instead of me being upset and him asking “What’s wrong?” only after days of my brooding and withholding important things from him. (Sidenote: as open as I am, this is unlikely to happen for 3 days… but you get the gist.)

Passionate. ‘Nuff said.

Quiet – I love to talk (probably too much), but I would love to be able to have someone who embodies the song “Easy Silence”, someone who can be silent with me and there is no need to fill every void with talking.

Ready – I’ve never been one who is looking to get hitched immediately. No way. But when I have the guy and I’m ready, the last thing I need to hear is “I think I’ll be ready in about 5 more years.” Ugh.

Serene – Someone without a temper has my vote. My feathers don’t get ruffled and I don’t want someone I have to hold back from punching something or someone.

Thrifty – I am a thrift queen and have been my entire life. I don’t see that changing, so I am going to need someone who doesn’t run up credit card bills on frivolous things like a ton of Xbox games (see Mature).

Understanding – Sometimes I have moments where I feel like the poster child for kookiness. Hence the need for understanding.

Veracious – Webster says this means “speaking the truth.” No question – this is of utmost importance.

Well-rounded – A true renaissance man is the best.

Xenophobic – I would love to have someone who hates foreigners. Just Kidding. That would tick me off in a hurry. (X-words were slim pickin's.)

Yogic – If he can downward dog with me, then I will be thanking my lucky stars.

Zestful – Everyone loves a little spice.

1 comment:

  1. sensational a to z wish list my dear...you deserve every letter. i love the reference to your "plant friends" by the way.